Column
Reinhild Fürstenberg
“Very sexy”: What to do if the boss writes Intrusive WhatsApp?
In Grapschern the case is obviously sexual harassment, but it can start much lower threshold
© tomazl / Getty Images
Mrs. S. feels from the sayings and WhatsApp messages from your boss is harassing and needs to learn how to defend themselves. The case shows that Sexual harassment in the workplace does not begin when someone grabs.
Of Reinhild Mountain Prince
In front of me, Mrs. S., 37 years of sitting, for a few months the senior employee in a large company. She is not quite sure to whom they should apply, and whether it is with me at all really, because it is actually happens nothing…
What was “actually happening”?, I ask Mrs. S. in fact, it is actually very satisfied in their Job. She leads a small Team, exciting tasks, and gets good Feedback. Nevertheless, you will prefer not to work, because your area Manager, a longtime employee of the company, power to create: If Mr. M. with the other colleagues in the Team zotige women-jokes like that, Andrea, you and your colleagues – what do they say? You had to get used somehow. His eyes, however, is not. The harmless questions about your relationship status and allusions to their appearance could you transfer each Time, professionally. On a party he came near her but always wanted to accompany you home and sent her that same night, several WhatsApp messages. The supposed compliment, she looked to the night “very sexy”.
© Verena Reinke
Since you don’t know really how she should conduct herself: she feels comfortable in the company and would not be in Trouble. Don’t want to talk to Mr M. first. She tried, but he just said not to do so. The touch had been purely random, the message “only a joke”.
Typical case of reverse
What was happening here, is quite typical for cases of sexual harassment in the workplace and is called “reverse”: Mr. m was. to Mrs. S., both non-verbally by his looks, and WhatsApp messages as well as verbally through his bawdy jokes and questions and even physically at the Party grip By the arrangement of his behavior as harmless, and their behavior as the uptight Mr M. Mrs S. made for your Problem – “she’s only got himself to blame!” and at the same time silenced.
Our first consultation hour, I took advantage of for a thorough education on the topic of self-to your Right and your choice. For example, sexual harassment in a professional context in General, has nothing to do with the contact-initiation and sexuality, but rather with the abuse of power, hierarchy-Demonstration competition-elimination, or the undermining of authority.
However, in your response to Mr is essential. He needs a STOP, a clear Signal that he has exceeded the limits of Mrs S., so that he can change his behavior – because many of the cross-border riders, there is a lack of awareness in terms of their effect on others. I can convince Mrs p that it starts a conversation attempt. We practice in a very practical, on how you can make this short “announcement” on their way. The next day she wants to talk to him.
Who is not clear, needs to feel the consequences
In addition, I encourage Ms. S., that you can turn to if Mr. M. is not in the conversation insightful, and his behavior does not significantly change the appeal of your business location. The General law on equal treatment obliges the employer to absolute protection of its employees and must ensure in the case of a sexual Assault as soon as possible to ensure that the behavior is prevented. Fortunately, I know that the company has been established by Mrs S. a process-structure for cases like your.
Mrs S. is a relief after the hour. It felt good to talk openly with someone about their experiences. She is looking forward to the conversation with Mr. M., and glad not to have to in the which cannot tolerate the victim role to remain, but to actively do something in order to put the harassment to an end.
The next time we talk, I learn that the personal interview with Mr M. went, unfortunately, without result. The company has, nevertheless, a proportionate response: According to an official complaint by Mrs S. and Mr M. had been in a different Position. Why? Mrs S. was not an isolated incident – it appeared that Mr M. had already harassed several employees of all hierarchy levels. In the company’s talks with him had been led for a long time. The case of Mrs. S., was the impetus for a warning, and the displacement of long-time employee.
Here are my tips for you:
- Sexual harassment in the workplace, verbal, non can be verbal or physical, and hits both men and women.
- Note as a guideline: Sexual harassment in the workplace starts where for you personally a limit has been exceeded. Noticeable this makes a unwohlen feeling.
- The delineation of a flirtation to sexual harassment is clearly defined by the undesirability and violation of Dignity. So pay attention to your individual limits, keep you also in the company, but together, a casual relaxed atmosphere, to Flirt, for example, under the conditions referred to allowed.
- Get help! No matter which side you are: Whether as a Person who has been harassed, whether or not as a Person who is accused of harassment, whether as a witness or as a leader. Your employer is required by law to let any Person in connection with sexual harassment in the workplace assistance.
- And act! Immediately. Nothing to do, is always wrong.
- To let you no reverse, no one has to “distinguish more clearly”, “less sexy” to attract, or the like.
- They are aware of their Power, which was placed by the legislature in the hands, be aware: you need to Act responsibly and go at the same time every step is necessary.
- For more information and help, you can find here: www.antidiskriminierungsstelle-datenbanken.de or under the 030-185551855.
* Anonymised case example from the consulting practice of the Fürstenberg Institute. The case was anonymised with the consent of the person Concerned.
More columns by Reinhild Fürstenberg:
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The colleague has an alcohol problem – so you can react properly
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